Are They Brothers? Test 5

Zander Cannon and Kevin Cannon claim not to be brothers. But they both live in Minnesota, are both over six feet tall, both went to Grinnell College, and are both cartoonists. Not brothers?? Not likely!! So here at Big Time Attic, we've decided to do a little bit of extremely scientific testing to find out the truth once and for all.

Never let it be said that the Cannon boys aren't in touch with their feelings. They don't just cynically click through the answers of these scientific tests just so they can be Yoda. Sometimes life requires a bit of quiet reflection. A reassessment of all that has gone before. A thoughtful self-analysis. And a really boring test result. Zander and Kevin took this test: The Rate My Life Quiz.

Zander's results:

This Is My Life, Rated
Life:	8
Mind:	7.1
Body:	9.6
Spirit:	6.7
Friends/Family:	6.3
Love:	9.1
Finance:	7.9
Take the Rate My Life Quiz

Zander says: Whoopty-ding.


Kevin's results:

This Is My Life, Rated
Life:	7.6
Mind:	8
Body:	8.4
Spirit:	7
Friends/Family:	5
Love:	5.7
Finance:	6.1
Take the Rate My Life Quiz

Kevin Says: This is boring. Let's go find out which sitcom family we are.

Are They Brothers? Part 4

Zander Cannon and Kevin Cannon claim not to be brothers. But they both live in Minnesota, are both over six feet tall, both went to Grinnell College, and are both cartoonists. Not brothers?? Not likely!! So here at Big Time Attic, we've decided to do a little bit of extremely scientific testing to find out the truth once and for all.

If there's any test that will TRULY determine whether Zander and I are actually brothers, The OC test is sure to be it. In fact, the core theme of the show revolves around two cool dudes who are brothers in every way except by birth -- just like me and Z! LOL!

For those of you who haven't seen the show, and you're rolling your eyes right now, let me admit that yes, it was a teen soap opera. But unlike its 90210 older cousin, the OC had quick wit (often ad-libbed), a fourth wall-breaking self-deprecating sense of humor, and even featured a long-running story arc about one of the characters working for Wildstorm. Not too far off the mark from ol' BTA, eh?

And if you're still not convinced that you should take this show seriously, Ira Glass raved about the OC on a recent "This American Life" after which he had Mates of State cover the show's theme song ... so there you go.

Moving on to the test (which can be found here), a result of Seth/Ryan would prove past a shadow of a doubt that Zander and I are brothers, and in all honestly we could stop taking these tests. Seth, of course, is a cartoonist who plays video games all the time (Zander), and Ryan is a ladies man who broods a lot and often looks at things out of the corner of his eye (me).

CONCLUSION:

Well, it looks like we'll keep taking the test in coming weeks ...

ZANDER'S RESULT:



A loyal husband, caring lawyer and supportive father, Sandy Cohen is the rock of The OC. His words of wisdom and humorous, laid back attitude are always appreciated.



KEVIN'S RESULT:



Everyone loves Seth Cohen. Always good for a laugh, always there for Ryan and finally winning over the ladies, Seth brings enjoyment to every scene that he participates in. Although Seth was raised in the wealthy, sometimes superficial environment of Newport, he's very down to earth and caring.
This scientific test claims that Zander and I have a father/son relationship, not a brotherly one.

Brotherhood Likelihood: 23%

Now if you don't mind, Zander has a troubled teen to take under his wing and I have to go run away in my sailboat.

Are They Brothers? part 3

Zander Cannon and Kevin Cannon claim not to be brothers. But they both live in Minnesota, are both over six feet tall, both went to Grinnell College, and are both cartoonists. Not brothers?? Not likely!! So here at Big Time Attic, we've decided to do a little bit of extremely scientific testing to find out the truth once and for all.

Star Wars! Star Wars! Star Wars! Man, I love Star Wars. I sure hope we're cool, awesome characters. On with the test, which is Liquid Generation's Star Wars Personality Test. Those guys at Liquid Generation sure seem like reasonable, knowledgeable folks. Man, I can't wait to find out what characters we are.

KEVIN'S RESULT:



KEVIN SAYS: I'm Anakin, huh? I guess it's 'cause I have all those romulan pellets in my system or whatever they're called. So when do I get to meet Padme?

ZANDER'S RESULT:



ZANDER SAYS: Son. Of. A bitch.

RESULTS: Despite the fact that this test is clearly flawed... somehow... the Cannon Boys seem to both be from the lame prequels, both whine a lot, and both made Episode I unwatchable crap. Thanks a lot, us, you jerks! Looks like the pendulum has swung the other way--

Brotherhood Likelihood: 74%

Are They Brothers? Test 2

Zander Cannon and Kevin Cannon claim not to be brothers. But they both live in Minnesota, are both over six feet tall, both went to Grinnell College, and are both cartoonists. Not brothers?? Not likely!! So here at Big Time Attic, we've decided to do a little bit of extremely scientific testing to find out the truth once and for all.

This week, we go boldly where no one has gone before and take not one but three Star Trek tests. Both Cannon boys are notoriously thorough, don't you know. Hmm.

Test #1: Matthew Barr's Star Trek Personality Test
Zander's result:

ZANDER SAYS: Sweet.

Kevin's result:

KEVIN SAYS: Spock is the robot one, right?

Test #2: Sea Breeze Computers' Star Trek Personality Test
Zander's result:

ZANDER SAYS: Really?

Kevin's result:

KEVIN SAYS: Wow, only 30% on Spock for this one. Having never seen the show, I can only guess from the photo that Mr. Picard is a kind and gentle older gentleman.

Test #3: Blifaloo.com's Star Trek Personality Quiz
Zander's result:

ZANDER SAYS: Yessss! And don't worry, everyone. I carry an inhaler for my charasthma.

Kevin's result:

KEVIN SAYS: Third time's a charm! Picard it is!

Truly, they could not be less alike. Bold and impetuous, quiet and reserved. They're like the yin and yang of spacefaring. And they're the favorite captains! But still-- as for this experiment:

Brotherhood Likelihood: 11%

Are They Brothers? Part 1

Zander Cannon and Kevin Cannon claim not to be brothers. But they both live in Minnesota, are both over six feet tall, both went to Grinnell College, and are both cartoonists. Not brothers?? Not likely!! So here at Big Time Attic, we've decided to do a little bit of extremely scientific testing to find out the truth once and for all.

Put on your lab goggles, and let's begin.

Test: Which Superhero Are You?

Zander's Results:
You are Superman



You are mild-mannered, good,
strong and you love to help others.




Kevin's Results:
You are Spider-Man

You are intelligent, witty,
a bit geeky and have great
power and responsibility.




Conclusions: Kevin ranks below 50% on all of Zander's top superheroes. The case for brothers is looking grim. Plus, Kevin has 5% more Catwoman in him than Zander does. And Zander is 60% Supergirl, as well as being equal parts Wonder Woman and The Hulk. I can't see these guys being raised by the same people.

First test says:

Brotherhood Likelihood: 36%